VIP 002 – Building Relationships… Not Just Numbers!

[powerpress] In Episode #2 of the Viralizers Insiders Podcast (a.k.a #VIP) we’re talking about…  “How to Build Your Relationships… Not Just The Number of Followers In Your Tribe!”

Viralizers Insider Podcast

VIP002 – Viralizers Insider Podcast

Building Relationships VS. Just Numbers!

So one of the things that I’ve been working lately, is the creation of the “Viralizers Manifesto” – a manifesto which is made up of our shared beliefs that we as Viralizers live-by. And one of those beliefs is that…

We Build Relationships… Not Just Numbers!

What do I mean by that is?

Here’s the deal, too many of us, including me at times, are focused on…  “Building the number of followers, fans, friends, or some number that equals the total number of people in a “group!”

But here’s the problem with that… Unless you’re doing a webinar, or some type of live event… You’re never speaking to the whole group!

And to dig even deeper, when an opportunity comes your way, whether it be in the form of a interview, potential partnership, book deal, whatever… It’s not going to be 1,000 people on a conference call hitting you up… It’ll be one person that came across some piece of content that you put out there, for the world to see how much value you have to offer.

You follow me?

All it takes to change your life overnight, is one person with the right opportunity.  And this is why most people are failing today. Too many of us are focused on the number of fans, followers or email addresses on an email list… Which all have a total value of ZERO!

What really matters, what really does equal value… Is the relationships you have with each, and every one of those followers, fans & friends.

It’s all about the relationships, the trust, and the likability that we build with the people that happen to be a part of a group (a.k.a fans, followers, friends).

Now you always hear me talking about “Building Your Tribe!” But understand that…

Followers, Fans, A List… Doesn’t Equal A Tribe!

Don’t get me wrong, when someone join the group of people following you on Twitter, Facebook, etc… They’re about half way there! 

But the day you interact with that person, meaning you retweet their tweet, reply to something they post, thank them for following you… And then they respond back… That IS the day that person is now a part of your tribe!

Did you notice how I said that YOU are the one that should… “retweet their tweet, reply to something they post, thank them for following you?”

Don’t wait around expecting people to come kissing you a$$.

It always makes me laugh when people come to me, all upset… Why? Because they built up some followers, posted a tweet (without any hashtags, without @tagging anyone, just a link and that’s it)… And then they cry when everyone of their followers isn’t jumping at the chance to spread their tweet.

The reason those followers are never gonna share tweets for those people is because… THEY DON’T KNOW THE PERSON EVEN EXISTS YET!!!

All it would take to fix this problem… Would be to actually engage & interact with your audience. Even if, the conversation you have with each person is NOT about work (yup, I said it… we don’t always have to be talking shop!)

Lets Play Out An Example…

Let’s use Joe as our example. Joe goes out every day, builds up the number of followers, fans by running ads, and people on his list. But, Joe never takes the time to actually engage with any one of the people he is building up.

Nope, instead, Joe simply sends out a bunch of automated tweets, automated emails, etc… And every communication he has with them… Is some type of a pitch with a link back to some squeeze page, or salesletter.

Now Joe’s been doing this for months and is starting to wonder… “Why the hell isn’t anyone clicking on his links?”

Sound familiar? Listen, we’ve all been there… Right?  We’ve all been fed this lie that… 

“All you need to do is get a bunch of people following you, to become your fan, or join my e-mail list… And BOOM, you’ll be living on your yacht in no time.”

The problem is, the number of people we have in our tribe doesn’t matter at all.  Over the years I’ve met people that CRUSH IT, make a ton of money, even win prizes for making the most sales in Affiliate Contests… And they do it with a few hundred people in their tribe.

Honestly, I myself was the #1 affiliate for a $1500 product. A product launch that literally had some of the big players, with the biggest lists, all promoting for it…

Yet I was the #1 affiliate. And at the time, all I had was 1200 fans, a few thousands followers on Twitter, and no email list. Even though I didn’t have 100,000’s of people on some list… One thing I did have, was relationships with the majority of the people following me.

If all we do is send our followers a bunch of promotions, without any interaction in between… Then they’re not going to care about what we have to say… EVER!

However, if on the other hand, we actually care about the people in our tribe, take a sincere interest in each n’ every one of them, and we take the time to acknowledged them first… Then they will to acknowledge us (a.k.a YOU!) 

How To Build Relationships With Your Tribe?

Well the first thing we need to understand is that, it’s not like we have to spend an hour a day talking to every single person in our tribe, every single day. All it takes to comment, reply to &/or acknowledge someone in your tribe… Is literally a few seconds.

And if all you do is acknowledge a handful per day… That’s plenty.

You see, once you acknowledge someone, they will now know that you exists. This is step one. Then from there, even if all you do is have one conversation per week, or even per month… Once again, that’s plenty.

Now I know some people might be thinking that… “Taking time to comment on someone in your tribes post that has a pic of their dog, is a waste of time”… But believe me it’s not!

Here’s Why It’s Not A Waste Of Time…

If someone is in your group of followers, it’s most likely because you targeted them… Right? And the only people that we, as Viralizers target, are other “Viralizer Fans” – the most active commentors, retweeters & influencers in your market).

So let’s say that yesterday, one of your Viralizers Fans (a.k.a followers), posted a picture of their dog yesterday. When you seen the post with the picture, you commented and said “what a cute pup!”

What do you think will happen today, when you share a link to your blog post and Joe sees it? Joe will probably be more than willing to check it out, and even share it… Right? Especially due to the fact that we know she/he is a Viralizer Fan! 

Had you not interacted with that “Viralizer Fan” the day before… Chances are they would’ve never given your tweet/post a second look. The only reason Joe would glad to do that for you is… You acknowledged him.

As Humans, We All Need To Be Acknowledged…

The problem is, especially on social media sites, no one is looking to acknowledge other people.


Most people are only, looking to be acknowledged, not do the acknowledging… Right?

Well, because of this fact, only a handful of people will ever comment/acknowledge, on anyone’s posts on Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, Google+, etc!

Which means, when you reply, retweet or share a post from one of your followers… You’ll most likely be the only person to do so, making you stand out like a sore-thumb.

So instead of being one of hundreds, or even thousands, of that persons friends/followers… You’ll become one 5-10 people that actually acknowledged that person, basically making you that person best friend instantly!

This Is Really Powerful AND Can Be Used For Evil…

But please know that I don’t tell you to do this, nor do I do this, for what I might get in return.  Personally, I believe that that only people that should do this, are people who actually care about others and like engaging.

If that’s not you… Then please don’t use this and mess it up for the rest of us.

However, if you do enjoy interacting with others… Then this is a surefire way to starting build some loyal, hardcore, cult-like followers… Instantly!
So with this philosophy in mind, when this gets coupled with the Viralizer Formulas you’re about to learn on this podcast episode… “VIP002 – How to Recruit the Viralizer Fans of Your Market Into Your Tribe!”
So what do you think? Tell me your story, thoughts &/or suggestion… For Building Relationships, Not Just Numbers!

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Thanks Kevin for this insight - you got this one absolutely right - quality not quantity. I am totally in agreement with you.


Thanks Kevin for the post - really believe that many people could benefit from not just chasing the "numbers" of followers but realising that relationships are the first priority. Thanks for taking the time to make this podcast and being generous with your content.


@JacquesWerth Check out a very interesting tribe building concept by @KevinDasilva


talk2sage Hey George, thanks so much for the feedback. As simple as this formula is... It really is the most crucial formula of all... Especially in 2013. Thanks again for taking the time to comment & retweet. ~Kevin


@PeteBillingham Hey Pete, its my absolute pleasure. The funny thing is Pete, when you focus on Relationships vs Numbers... You actually get more numbers! lol Its counter-intuitive, but its a fact. Thanks again for a great comment & feedback!~Kevin


Thanks so much for the comment and mention  @JacquesWerth . So glad you liked it. ~ @KevinDasilva